Thursday, 5/12/11, 6:00pm - It's been just about a week since Mother's Day.
Like many others, I spent the day with mom. We did her favorite things. Mom and I went to lunch and ate Chinese (because Dad won't take her there - he doesn't like Chinese food), and I took her to the casino to play the slots.
But in a lot of ways, the woman who raised me and sacrificed so much for her children, a woman I love, is a stranger.
My mom was a big baker. 2,500 cookies every Christmas. And could she talk. And talk. And talk. Her chatty personality turned a quick conversation into a 30-minute ordeal. Her boss once quipped, "Mary would talk to a fire hydrant." I found myself knocking on my own door while on the phone with her at college. The reason: I could tell her someone was there and I had to go.
I haven't known that woman for more than two years.
Last January, my mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease.
She's 56 years young.
She's unable to cook. She's quiet in conversations. Her short-term memory is gone.
The decision to move back home followed her diagnosis. I had to put family first.
I spent four years away from home at college, and worked in other cities for six years before moving back to Rochester.
I felt so guilty. She cried every time I left after coming home for a visit. Every. Single. Time.
I loved the experiences I had living out of town, and I advanced my career. I called home at least once a week, sometimes daily.
But there isn't a day I don't think about the years I spent away from home. Was I selfish? Will I be able to forgive myself for losing time I can't get back?
So, give your parents a call. Stop by for a visit. Don't make a decision you'll regret.
-Jason Dusett, 13WHAM Producer
-jdusett@13wham.com
